I haven't managed a post in an absolute age. You might, perhaps, have noticed.
Having been absent for so long, it seems a shame to moan at this point. But such is life.
Yesterday, you see, The B had his regular post-school swimming lesson.
For him, this is great fun. For The G, unable to join in and forced to spectate, it is something that must be endured.
The main problem is the temperature (uncomfortable in the extreme, the poolside conditions are comparable to those deep inside a hotter-than-average volcano), although the seating (manufactured to a design that defies all tried and trusted ergonomic principles) and duration (30 long, long minutes) also leave a great deal to be desired.
Half-an-hour is an awfully long time for a four-year-old to spend in such an unforgiving environment. Sometimes, to help her pass the time, I take along our iPad.
Yesterday - The G engrossed in a game, The B practising his backstroke - all had been going to plan . . .
Until, that is, an overly-officious staff member approached and threatened to have us removed from the premises.
Our heinous misdemeanour - he informed me, with obvious relish - had been to bring a prohibited electronic device into the building, contravening the council's child protection policies and threatening the wellbeing of everyone in our immediate vicinity.
For the record, The G hadn't been photographing the children in their swimwear.
Indeed, she has forgotten that the iPad has a camera and, even if she did happen to remember, she has eyes for the games and nothing else.
Indeed, she has forgotten that the iPad has a camera and, even if she did happen to remember, she has eyes for the games and nothing else.
It didn't matter that she's four. It didn't matter that she'd been doing nothing more threatening than playing Toca Monster. It didn't matter that me removing the iPad, forcibly, from her grasp and leaving her with no entertainment form for the lesson's remaining 20 minutes left her perilously close to tears. It didn't even matter that most other parents before our lecture (and, it must be noted, several after it) were quite clearly fiddling on mobile phones, tablets and other such devices, all without censure, with the unspoken understanding that no sinister acts were being committed in the process.
Being a parent, child protection is a subject that matters to me. I get that, given its duty of care, the council has to take certain steps and I even understand that such things are well intentioned.
I also believe, however, that discretion can be exercised, that over-zealous enforcement can border on the ridiculous and that, as in all things, common sense should always be allowed to prevail.
